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Sherri Nickols asked:




“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”

–Confucius

Do you feel stuck? Overwhelmed? Confused? If you are going through or just went thru a life altering change like divorce you may not know where to begin to re-build your life. Read on for some tips on how to create the life of your dreams.

Believe it or not there are rules for making dreams come true and without knowing the rules your dreams may stay just that…desires in the ethers that never manifest. You don’t want that!

If you are not clear about your future you will need to do a little soul searching. It’s time to dig deep and ask yourself what will make your life sparkle with meaning and fulfillment. Once you have a dream plan you are ready for the rules:

o Know what you want – you must be crystal clear to manifest quickly. If you don’t know what you want, the universe will not know either. The other thing to be careful of here is a split message – saying you want something and then doubting you will receive it – this basically nullifies your desire and you end up flat lining through life.

o Be aware of how you want this to show up in your life and express a strong emotion about it. Know exactly how you want to experience your desire and take 17 seconds to really feel yourself having it. Every 17 seconds of pure thought is equal to 2000 hours of action- so feel deeply and often.

o Proclaim it – own it as though it already exists in your life. Verbalize to the world, with no doubt, exactly what you want and end your proclamation with these two words…or better.

o Detach and let it go. Trust the universe to figure out the “how” and bring it to you in the best way imaginable. Relinquish control and know that the divine is far wiser and always working in your best interest.

Having a goal, a vision, a dream for the direction of your life will move you forward instantly. You don’t need to have your final destination figured out, just plod along in small increments and follow the rules above; you will soon be experiencing a better quality of life.

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Abby P. Munroe asked:




If your marriage is on the rocks and you think the only solution is divorce, but that’s not what you want, I want you to know there is hope and that you save your marriage and have a better relationship with your husband than you may have thought possible. Relax, take a deep breath and keep reading to see four easy ways to restore your marriage.

1. Be careful how you handle arguments.

All relationships, including marriages-maybe especially marriages,-have arguments. You will have less emotional turmoil if you can accept that no two people will always agree on everything. But what is important is how we handle our disagreements.. Now, I know how easy it is to fling words at your spouse in anger, but such behavior does not lead to a happy marriage. There is nothing harmless about fighting. In fact, it is addictive and can cause untold hurt and irreparable damage to the relationship.

Everyone has emotions and keeping our cool is usually difficult unless we happen to have a very calm, mellow personality. Sometimes we may have to literally bite our tongue to keep emotions in check. I have never felt sorry for the times I didn’t make an angry retort, but have always been sorry when I did. For some of us thinking before we speak doesn’t come naturally, but it’s a good habit to develop.

2. Get out of your routine. For most couples, life takes over after marriage; careers, children, parents, etc seem to demand more and more of our time and energy. Many couples fall into what we may at first think is a comfortable routine but may really be a boring rut. If this is part of the problem in your relationship consider changing things up.

Schedule some time for just you and your husband to do something fun on a regular basis. It doesn’t have to be every week, nor does it have to be expensive. Just plan an outing or even an in home evening with only the two of you as often as you can swing it.

Let him know how much you love and appreciate him in a tangible way. Cook his favorite dinner, buy a CD you know he would really like-it’s even better if it’s an artist you don’t particularly like.

Too often when women get together they spend way too much time complaining about their husbands. Even worse is when wives criticize husbands in front of other people. You can easily turn the conversation in a positive direction by saying something nice about your husband. You will probably be shocked at how the other wives will start making positive comments about their husbands also.

4. Deal with your finances openly and honestly

Money issues are the cause of most of the problems facing married couples today. Many bring a large amount of debt into the marriage and then add to it as a couple. If this is true in your case you can relieve the stress financial problems cause.

You and your husband need to look at your family budget together. Look at your spending habits carefully and see where cuts can be made. Also use this time to talk about your short term as well as long term goals.

If either or both of you has a tendency to frivolously purchase things, this could be an indication that you don’t respect your mate. Before you make a purchase ask yourself if it’s something you need. If it’s something you want, ask yourself why.

All relationships require work to make them successful. You can have a successful marriage if you and your husband are committed to each other and willing to work at it.

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Sherri Nickols asked:




“Today I know that I cannot control the ocean tides. I can only go with the flow. Today I can learn how to float to the top and let myself be carried buoyantly joyously through life. When I struggle and try to organize the Atlantic with my specifications, I sink. If I flail, and thrash, and growl, and grumble, I go under. But if I let go and float, I am borne aloft.” -Marie Stilkind

Are you in an emotionally challenging situation? If so life can seem like a scary dark jungle – uncharted territory that may cause you to question which way to turn and who to trust. Are you trying to control everything in order to feel safe? Read on to find out the pitfalls of control.

The truth is, you’re going through a big shake up for a reason:

o If you don’t have faith and let go of control you will drive those who are honestly trying to help you away. No one likes to be manipulated. You must believe all will be fine because just like a cat with nine lives you are going to land on your feet.

o Controlling others and situations will keep your greater good from finding you. Control has the energy of fear – fear that you will be hurt. This energetic wall will actually attract what you don’t want and block what you do want.

o Painful experience may have you buying into the belief that you can control circumstances and people to avoid future pain. I can certainly understand that line of thinking but it just doesn’t work that way. The only person you can control is yourself.

o Lost opportunities for growth – as uncomfortable as pain is, it provides spiritual growth, enlightenment and strength -unachievable without encountering a few speed bumps in life.

o Worry and fear create a desire to control – creating tension and rigidity – really bad news for the body. If you can let go and flow you’ll create a life of ease and happiness

Take it from me, psychic seeking Queen – I spent a fortune trying to “know” what the future held so that I could control every circumstance around me. It took me a long time to realize that the universe works double time to provide opportunities for the most awesome life imaginable. Much better than I could plan for myself.

Once I trusted this to be true I had such inner peace about the direction of my life, not to mention the money I saved! So sit back, think happy thoughts and have faith.

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James Walsh asked:




Sorting Out the Issues

A divorce usually leaves people emotionally exhausted. You have gone through the whole range of human emotions and passions in a very short period of time and now all the colour seems to have drained out of life. You just don’t have the energy to feel anything again. So the first hurdle that you must overcome is this deadened feeling. One good way of getting started is to make a list of things you need to sort out. This is more or less a mechanical activity, so it is not going to take emotional effort, but get things moving again.

Have you taken stock of your exact financial situation? If you haven’t, then get it done. This does not mean only your bank account, but also the shares, investments, insurance and other financial assets. To speak generally, take stock of the situation first. You also need to see if all payments concerning divorce are done. Are there any pending bills that may come up to bug you at inconvenient times? Also, see if you are yet to get some payments that are due to you. Are all the divorce settlement papers in order? Put them into folders and keep them in a safe place. Check whether all signatures and stamps have been affixed. Make a soft copy of all pages and save online and take a backup too. If there have been any online transactions, take hard copies and insert in the correct folders.
The House and Other Assets

Now that you know where you stand money-wise, you can start planning about maintaining the house. If you have got your old residence, it may help to do it up in a different way. The familiar objects usually hold too many painful and potent memories. Simple things such as changing the drapes and rearranging the furniture have done wonders to refresh other women trying to put the past where it belongs. If you have got the car, you need to take charge of its maintenance totally now. If the car is not around anymore, you need to buy one. If the finances are not very rosy, you will have to go for a second hand one, or maybe just manage without a personal vehicle for sometime. If you have got other property to look after, make a visit and put things in order there. Remember that property is an asset; if you need it, you can rent it out.

Your Career

If you had been working, then there is no question of letting your career suffer because of the divorce. Years of effort have gone behind making you who you are today, so this is an important part of your identity that is unrelated to your marriage. If you neglect your work for too long, even the most understanding colleagues would start resenting it. If you were not the earner, then you really have no time to lose. No matter how much money you have saved up, it will run out one day. Maintenance is useful, but most of it will be spent in taking care of the house and paying bills. Now that you are on your own, it also means that you are free to explore all the opportunities possible. You can start a home business; a lot of women have made astounding careers on internet business after divorce. If you have worked before marriage but have not done so for the past few years, the road is not going to be smooth. But you cannot afford to give up, so do not lose heart, and if none of the companies seem to want you, start off with your own home business and odd jobs. It is bad, but if you don’t do anything, it will get worse.
Managing Children

Your partner is not around anymore, but a child would want a father. This is not unfair on you; it is a natural urge. Try to be patient with your child. Remember that you have more responsibilities now. But do not resent your ex’s visits and contact with the child.

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Kenneth Bachman asked:




After a break up, you might decide not to get into a serious relationship again because you are afraid of getting hurt once more. You may even fear that you might not find another person because your self-esteem was shattered. Feelings of not being good enough for anyone might lurk in your mind. This is quite normal to experience.

First, you must stop thinking and talking about him or her. Easier said than done right? No matter how difficult it seems, you must stop contacting or spying on your ex. If you continue this behavior, you will never forget about him or her.

Return their things or dispose them. It is a way of assuring yourself that you have really accepted that the relationship is over. Keep the gifts, photographs and cards that you have received out of your sight. Even consider changing your telephone number. This will keep you from waiting by the phone for him or her to call.

What is the worst thing that can happen from the break up? You definitely have learned something from the relationship, about yourself and your partner. It’s up to you to answer that.

But what is more important is to get on with your life. It is not the end of the world. You still have your family, friends, and career ahead of you.

You can make new friends that may develop into better relationships. You can do things that you wanted done but held on because he did not like it.

Sitting alone in your house or apartment sulking away is a waste of time and energy. Figuring a way to get even may satisfy you to a certain extent but it does not benefit you in any other way.
Remember that they are getting on with their life and you are wasting yours away. The best thing you can do is to work on yourself, on your personal goals.

Start a journal. Writing down your feelings, thoughts and emotions is therapeutic. You are able to keep track of how you are managing your life after your loved one is gone.

Keeping a journal will allow you to see the growth you make after the break up. Write down your daily activities and your observations including the people you meet and the things you do either at work or at home.

You will realize that there are actually many things that are going on around you. It will also help you see a new relationship building up.

When you are ready to move on, try online dating. It is safer than going out to the bar. Additionally there are many free sites on the internet that offer the same features as the paid sites. There has been a lot of positive feedback with TheBadge.org They offer free background investigations for all of their members as well as Chat Rooms, Public Forums, Instant Messaging, and more.

If all else fails, consult a relationship expert. You know you need one when you have developed the suicidal tendencies.

career divorce women

For example if a husband and wife divorce, their kids are constant reminders of their ex. Maybe they have good reasons to really hate their ex. The kids are made from the ex though. They may look and act like the ex. Even if they don’t, they’re constant reminders of a troubled past.

Sometimes there are news stories about people who kill their kids after divorce. Some men go psycho after divorce and kill their (ex) family. Some women meet a new man but the man sees the kids as obstacles, then the woman or man kills the kids.

My mom has been single for almost 13 years and now wants to get back on the dating scene. Where would be a good place for her to start? We are very religious and she wants to date inside our religion. Any tips or ideas will be helpful! Thanks!

why does our legal system seemingly always side with the women where the kids are concerned? i pay my child support every week, i always pick up my kids when i am supposed and drop them off on time. both of them want to live with me, yet i fear that i will not get a judgement in my favor if i try to get custody. by the way, the kids mom is also mentally and emotionally abusive.

I have two boys 1 and 3 . My husband and I have been married for 10 yrs, through our rocky marriage, finally I want to divorce him but I am scared about raising the boys alone. I work full time and try to spend a lot of time with my sons but how hard is it raise boys alone and do you have any tips/strategies for me? also my 3 yr old is diagnoised with autism.
I still don’t know how much active he will be!

just started seeing this girl a single mother of 1. I really like her but have never dated a single mother before. I am in need of a little guidance, advice or tips maybe how do i proceed into a relationship with her?